What's the most valuable lesson you've learned in life, and how has it impacted your journey so far?

Sex! Lingerie! Knock knock jokes!

Two letters of transit signed by General De Gaulle … Stimpy, you eediot!

Torchy thinks: Maybe I could play a gangster's moll since apparently smoking is still seen as wholesome and American.

How would you respond to Rep. Nancy Mace's claim that the GOP platform is more in line with what the American people want compared to the left?

Dick! I heard about the lay-off. What's a square-jaw crime fighter doing these days to bring in the bling?

Every day is a good day to punch a Nazi! I mean MAGA! I mean the Comics Code Authority! (I can never remember who is who)

I hear you're a stunt-double now for Fred in Scooby-Doo.

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After you lather me up with that strawberry hand lotion.

Before there was MAGA there was … the Comics Code Authority

Times might be tough … But at least there's one thing we all agree on.

In my experience, British people are fat, ugly and arrogant. Why is it and can it be changed?

Let's do what we always do, lay around half-naked while men make terrible jokes at our expense.

TEXT:

Yes, Tess, crime doesn't pay but apparently Rated-G horror does.

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Ironically, Wertham focused on stories about crime, singling out Batman and Robin for its gay subtext and Dick Tracy for its violence.

Remember, kids, masturbation will make you see the devil everywhere!

And I ended up moonlighting in Japanese porn, but the less said about that the better.

What were some things that the ancient Greeks excelled at compared to the Romans?

In order to answer this I came up with a little story that goes like this …

Torchy, we're unemployed … And no one is hiring scantily-clad wastrels these days.

Perhaps now we can explore what being a “gal pal” really means.

What are some things that children used to wait for, but are no longer common in today's society?

Just you, me, in a vat of lime jello, pulling hair, calling each other names …

¡Explotando Dick por todos lados!

Only zombies dig to rock and roll, daddy-O!

Do you think a lot of sociopaths' parents kill themselves for having brought such disgusting evil into the world? How much shame and disgust must they carry?

Speaking of which, poor Cleo Coco has ended up appearing in anti-vice pamphlets.

At least until the peyote kicks in ...

Shameless vixen! Trollop!

Why is my ping so high in 1 Roblox game but not the other ones? I am also not laggy in my own private server. What is happening?

And then working as Betty and Veronica's body doubles ...

Of all the layoffs, Torchy Todd and her gal pal, Tess Parker, were hit the hardest.

“Your boyfriend is a total perv, mommy.”

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In 1954 complete bastard and censorship campaigner Fredric Wertham published a book for the stated goal of creating a moral panic around comic book's alleged impact on juvenile delinquency. Much like the House Committee on Un-American Activities' disastrous impact on the film industry, the Comics Code Authority (obey, puny humans) put many hardworking comic book characters out of work all because of one poorly written book called …

But Tess! I mean Betty! I mean Veronica! (I can never remember who is who) which ever one you are, I love you!

Make Nazis afraid again!

Is it possible for a judge to hold someone in contempt for not being able to pay a fine that was imposed during their sentencing hearing?

I've also been making ends meet ... By appearing in Tijuana splatter comics as Evil Gringo #2.

Marijuana makes Jesus cry!

Tess' boyfriend, Ed, now works as a Peter Lorre impersonator.

Atheists claim that Earth is 10 billion years old, yet there are no fossils that old. What do you have to say for yourselves for lying?

Gadzooks! It's Torchy Todd slumming it in Yugoslavian science fiction! The shame!